“Another One Bites The Dust”, by Jimmy “Spiderman” Allen on Cue-2 Records.

Ah, yes.  Another Lions season is soon to be underway.  Training camp has started and the cornbread is flying off the shelves and being wolfed down already.  Our 45 yeard old starting quarterback has already predicted at least 10 wins this year.  We brought in about 15 back-up running backs to replace our beloved but injured Kevin Jones, whos legendary last half of the 2005 season is still being talked about.  I think we won a game during that time period thanks to Jones’s heroics.  The good news is, one of the back-ups, Tatum Bell, was said to have been hitting the holes harder than John Henry hit the railroad steel.  It is certain that Bell will rush for well over 2,000 yards and Kitna will throw for at least 5,000 yards.  Plus we made our slightly above average defensive end Corey Redding the highest paid player in his position in all of the NFL, so that will certainly translate into him dominating the opponents offense this year, all on his own.

And I’m not even going to talk about our prized #2 draft pick, wide reciever Calvin Johnson.  It is said that he parts the defense like the red sea, and already, without even playing a game, he is a no-question first ballot hall of famer, a top three - maybe five best of all time, and there is no doubt that he will smash Jerry Rice’s receiving records like an oversize wrecking ball into a glass house.

I am actually shocked that the NFL is going to go on with the 2007/2008 season, instead of just handing the Vince Lombardi trophy to the Lions right now.  The Lions will make the Dolphins undefeated ‘72 season look like a lucky fluke.

Not suprisingly, these levels of optimism have always surrounded our Lions.  Despite our annual pathetic group of players we trot out on the field, we always think we can do it.  We pack the sold-out stadium each Sunday, crowd around the living room TV, and cheer the old boys on.  Oh, there have been some good times, like when Wayne Fontes was the coach and it seemed as if every year we went 10-6 and then lost in the first round.  Those were the good old days.  And we had Barry Sanders, who, next to Michael Jordan, is perhaps the greatest and most entertaining athlete I have ever seen play.

Way back in 1980, the Lions were about the same as they are now.  They were coming off a 2-14 year, but the optimism was running high.  They had a defensive back named Jimmy “Spiderman” Allen who recorded a song, set to the tune of Another One Bites The Dust, about how awesome the Lions were going to be that upcoming season - they were Super Bowl bound: “Last year’s team was 2 and 14, but this is the year for New Orleans!”

That’s the old spirit!  C’mon Lions - you can do it this time!  Super Bowl or bust!

 - Another One Bites The Dust (Detroit Lions Song)